Take Me Home.

ihopethisurlisntyetclaimed: when zerrie argue do u think perrie’s all like ‘at least we won the x...

Sun, 12 May 2013 19:09:46 +0800

when zerrie argue do u think perrie’s all like ‘at least we won the x factor’

yes and zayn would be like, “at least we won so many awards, performed at the Olympics, has 2 #1 albums in several countries, been chosen as models for a clothing line, performed at MSG, sold out some arenas and currently having our 2nd tour for our second album”

And zayn would add, “and we were just 3rd placer”

“Hello.” I mumbled lazily as I placed the phone next...

Wed, 01 May 2013 15:19:51 +0800

“Hello.” I mumbled lazily as I placed the phone next to my ear.

“Harry…”

I automatically sat up, my eyes widening. I looked at the clock and I realized it was still 9 in the evening. I gulped and stood up, walking towards the table in my living room. “Hey. What’s up?”

“Nothing. I just wanna hear your voice.”

I closed my eyes, letting her words register. I bit my lip, not knowing what to reply. I heard her laugh and it made me smile. Her laugh is one of the best things in the world. “So, how’s life?”

“It’s good. The European tour is a success so far and I just can’t stop myself from thinking what have I done to be this blessed. The fans are really great. I owe them so much. We just —-“. I stopped talking, wiping my face. “Am I talking too much? I’m sorry. I really —”.

“No, it’s okay. Don’t worry.” She said softly. I nodded and exhaled heavily. What to do now? “Hey, remember that time when we went to the zoo?”

I laughed at the thought of her screaming because of the tiger that was staring at her. “Of course. God, I’ve never been embarrassed in my whole life.” I chuckled, my hand on my stomach.

“Yours was embarrassing! You freaked out when the monkey touched you!” She laughed at the other end. I wish I can see her right now.

“Yes but I got to kiss you right there so—-“ Shit. “Uhm, I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to…”

“Nah, it’s okay. Don’t worry. Past is past, right?” Hearing her say that was like being tortured in hell. I had never thought that I would just be part of her past; that I could never be part of her entire life. I heard her sniff and that made me sad. “Hey, are you crying?”

“No. I have a cold. Don’t worry.” She chuckled. She’s lying again. I’ve already mastered her. I know when she is lying or not and when she is happy or sad. I heard her sniff again and I really just want to go to her and have her in my arms like we usually do… years ago.

No one said anything after that and the silence was killing me. I suddenly heard myself say, “Why did you call? Please. Tell me.”

“I just miss you. That’s all.”

All the memories came back to my mind. The day I first saw her at the bookstore. The day I got to know her name. The days we’ve spent together. The first date we had that was organized by Liam and Niall. The time she introduced me to her family. The day we became an official couple. First kiss, first fight, first vacation, and so many firsts. The days when we just cuddle and block the world. The days when we thought that everything was perfect even though it’s actually not but by just having each other close, it was more than perfect. The day I asked her to marry me. She said yes and I was the happiest man on Earth. She was everything I needed. Heck, she is everything I need.

“You can’t just say that, you know.” I answered, trying to dodge all those memories. It’s over now. It’s been over for years.

“I know.” She whispered. And I know she was crying already. I gulped, trying to stop myself from crying. “I am not expecting anything. I just miss you.”

“Stop it, please.” I pleaded and my voice broke. Shit. “I don’t need this.”

Silence. I can’t take this anymore. I actually thought I have moved on already. It’s been years, for Pete’s sake. Grow up, Harry!! But then again, I realized that I still love her. So much. Why can’t I just accept that? I started to feel the pain again. The loneliness and everything I had felt when we broke up… They’re back and FUCK, they surely do know how to ruin someone. I started to cry, the tears streaming down my face. Fuck everything. Maybe I only need a closure. That’s it. Maybe, just maybe.

“Can you….” I said, wiping the tears in my eyes. I sighed and closed my eyes, swallowing the saliva that was forming in my mouth. “Please say my name. Please.”

I cried harder than before, wrapping my arms around my knees, phone still on my right ear. Please, just say my name.

“Harry. Harry. Harry. Harry.” She said. I closed my eyes, hand on my chest. Shit. This hurts so much. Fuck. Let it stop. “I’m so sorry. I’m really sorry.”

I didn’t respond. I can’t. Why should I listen to her? She fucking broke up with me. I did everything to get her back but nothing worked. After how many months, I learned that the management forced her to break up with me and since she didn’t want to be a distraction, she didn’t hesitate. And that made me even furious. If she loved me so much, she wouldn’t agree right? Fuck.

I heard a knock on my door. I wiped my face with the shirt and sniffed. Clearing my thought, I said, “Have to go. Nice talking to you again.”

“I love you.” Trust me, I just wanted to lay on the floor and bawl my eyes out. This is unfair. Why should I be the one that needs to suffer so much? I started crying again but I didn’t make any sound. Stop crying, Harry. For fuck’s sake, be a man.

“If you say so.” I answered, trying not to be mean or whatsoever. Believe me, I just want to punch myself. I heard her sigh and then, she ended the call. I sniffed and cried again. This time, I was shaking uncontrollably. I was kneeling on the floor, hand clutching my shirt. I started shouting. Why is this happening?! Why now?!! I shouldn’t be feeling thing this!

Someone opened the door and I saw my girlfriend running towards me. She knelt beside me and she was rubbing my back. She hugged me so tight, comforting me like a baby. See? This is the reason why I shouldn’t let her get in to me. I have a girl already. She’s nice but of course, she is nothing compared to her.

SHIT, HARRY. STOP BEING SO COMPLICATED. STOP IT. FUCK. GROW UP.

“Babe, are you okay? What happened?” She asked, rocking me back and forth.

“I love you too.” I said, closing my eyes.

I just posted 'Time Check - The "Bad Boy"' on Wattpad!

Tue, 23 Apr 2013 17:56:14 +0800

I just posted 'Time Check - The "Bad Boy"' on Wattpad!

Hi, guys. I wasn’t able to post the chapter because Tumblr won’t let me and it has been...

Mon, 22 Apr 2013 01:21:40 +0800

Hi, guys. I wasn’t able to post the chapter because Tumblr won’t let me and it has been days so I’ve decided to move to Wattpad and continue it there and I’ll be starting on a series called Setlist. I’m really sorry, guys. I have also adapted a new way of writing. Heh. I won’t be using this page anymore for all my stories. You can request for one shots there. I’m really sorry again. Love you all!! :)

Wattpad profile

gleek: So this tweet of username iJever got retweeted to my timeline by a...

Mon, 22 Apr 2013 01:13:15 +0800

gleek: So this tweet of username iJever got retweeted to my timeline by a...:

ihopethisurlisntyetclaimed:

So this tweet of username iJever got retweeted to my timeline by a friend of mine. I just want to give 10 out billion reasons why these girls want to meet celebrities so badly. And the following are the things that I feel as a fan of One Direction and what I see and observed with my fellow…

gleek: So this tweet of username iJever got retweeted to my timeline by a...

Mon, 22 Apr 2013 01:12:32 +0800

gleek: So this tweet of username iJever got retweeted to my timeline by a...:

ihopethisurlisntyetclaimed:

So this tweet of username iJever got retweeted to my timeline by a friend of mine. I just want to give 10 out billion reasons why these girls want to meet celebrities so badly. And the following are the things that I feel as a fan of One Direction and what I see and observed with my fellow…

(◡‿◡✿)

Sat, 20 Apr 2013 01:06:26 +0800

1: What would you name your future daughter?
2: Do you miss anyone?
3: What if I told you that you were pretty?
4: Ever been told “it’s not you, it’s me”?
5: What are you looking forward to in the next week?
6: Did you go out or stay in last night?
7: How late did you stay up last night?
8: Honestly, has anyone seen you in your underwear in the past 3 months?
9: What were you doing at 12:30 this afternoon?
10: Have you ever told somebody you loved them and not actually meant it?
11: Could you go for the rest of your life without drinking alcohol?
12: Have you pretended to like someone?
13: Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?
14: Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?
15: Is it hard for you to get over someone?
16: Think back five months ago, were you single?
17: Have you ever cried from being so mad?
18: Hold hands with anyone this week?
19: Did your last kiss take place in/on a bed?
20: Who did you last see in person?
21: What is the last thing you said out lot?
22: Have you kissed three or more people in one night?
23: Have you ever been to Paris?
24: Are you good at hiding your feelings?
25: Do you use chap stick?
26: Who did you last share a bed with?
27: Are you listening to music right now?
28: What is something you currently want right now?
29: Were your last three kisses from the same person?
30: How is your heart lately?
31: Do you wear the hood on your hoodie?
32: When was the last time a member of the opposite sex hugged you?
33: What do people call you?
34: Have you ever wanted to tell someone something but didn’t?
35: Are there any stressful situations in your life?
36: What are you listening to right now?
37: What is wrong with you right now?
38: Love really is a beautiful thing huh?
39: Do you make wishes at 11:11?
40: What is on your wrists right now?
41: Are you single/taken/heartbroken/confused/waiting for the unexpected?
42: Where did you get the shirt/sweatshirt you’re wearing?
43: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?
44: Have you hugged someone within the last week?
45: Have you kissed anyone in the last five days?
46: What were you doing at midnight last night?
47: Do you miss the way things were six months ago?
48: Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone?
49: Have you ever been to New York?
50: Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?

Hello, guys. Haven’t updated SHKY for days now. Sorry. I have summer classes and I’m...

Sat, 20 Apr 2013 00:56:25 +0800

Hello, guys. Haven’t updated SHKY for days now. Sorry. I have summer classes and I’m working on a new fanfic. I’ll post it later. Have a great day!! X

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Tue, 16 Apr 2013 19:47:06 +0800

becausebeingagleekiscool: Self harm? I’ve already done that....

Tue, 16 Apr 2013 16:39:17 +0800

becausebeingagleekiscool:

Self harm? I’ve already done that. For how many times. I seriously don’t regret doing that. It started when I was in 4th year high school. I was neither an outcast nor a popular girl. I was just this normal girl who was dating the council president of the “best” school in our place. People had spread bad things about me because of that. To top of all things, 2 of my guy classmates started bullying me because someone told them that I said they were idiots. I didn’t say that, though. I respect those guys so much. Worst thing is.. My friends didn’t defend me even though she knows the truth. And that was my turning point. I started to cut because the pain was too unbearable for me. It was so hard. Even the time I entered college, I still do self-harm.

Suicidal? I’ve been planning for years now. Whenever I see a knife in our place, I just want to grab it and just stab myself to end my life. I can see myself hanging, with a rope on my neck and a suicidal note on my hand. I was weak, I admit. People were making fun of me. They were only focusing on my mistakes. They’ve never seen my accomplishments. That’s what hurts me the most. One time, my parents were so mad at me because I didn’t got in the top 10. They said things about me and the fact that all those words came from them broke me. I shattered into pieces. I didn’t get mad at them, though. I got mad at me. I was so disappointed with myself that I even planned of jumping from our school’s 3rd floor. I stopped thinking of ending my life, though, when I realized that it won’t solve my problems and I’ll just hurt the people around me even though I know that some of them just won’t care.

Depressed? Always. I’m always pressured to do this and to do that. Even little things affect me. I overthink. I always think that the everyone’s problem is my problem. I care too much. I just can’t stand a day without being worried what will happen to other people and I just hate it so much. I can’t stop myself from caring. People never stopped throwing me insults; whether I’m ugly, fat, and everything. They say I’m intelligent but I just don’t use my brain. They say I have to be mature because I’m smart. All of those remarks just pressure me that all I do is eat, sleep, or cry at night. It felt like I’ve to change to please them. I can’t say that I got over this already but at least, I can control myself already. I am who I am and if you can’t accept it, fine. This is my life.

Unhappy? Yes. Most of the time.

Just lost a loved one? Yes and it was really heartbreaking. I almost lost my wits. I still blame myself for my cousin’s death even though I wasn’t really there. I keep on thinking that if only I wasn’t too lazy to inform my mom that something happened to my cousin, they could’ve still saved him. I cried for days. He was 4 years older than me and the accident happened exactly a month after he graduated. We had so many plans in our lives but we can’t do it together anymore. He was one of those few people who can understand me, who doesn’t judge me, and who knows what to do whenever I’m sad. It’s still hard knowing that I can’t see him again.

Everyone who knows me personally will actually be shocked if they’re reading this post because I’m actually labeled as this bubbly, optimistic, cheerful, and happy girl. Yes, that’s me but within me is a pessimistic and incomplete girl who has deep and dark secrets. I know this sounds crazy but One Direction helped me a lot. They are my comfort zone. They might not know that I exist but I am still thankful of them.

I’ve never realized all the shit and crap I have undergone until now. I’ve been through a lot and even though there were times that I almost gave up, I’m so proud of myself for not doing so. I’m a survivor and so are you. You are worth it. You are special. You are unique. You are someone’s angel and world. Don’t be insecure. You’re beautiful. You don’t have an exact copy of yourself. Love your life. Live your life. I love you.

So my sister just got home from the gym and she was still covered with sweat. I, then, smelled something foul and covered my nose.

Mon, 15 Apr 2013 22:14:23 +0800

So my sister just got home from the gym and she was still covered with sweat. I, then, smelled something foul and covered my nose.
Me: Woah. What's that smell?
Sister: *smells herself*
Me: Oh... Oh... OH IT'S YOU IT'S YOU IT'S YOU THEY ALL ADD UP TO

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Sun, 14 Apr 2013 23:07:53 +0800

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Sun, 14 Apr 2013 23:06:16 +0800

harryismy1dhottie: NO

Sun, 14 Apr 2013 23:05:41 +0800

harryismy1dhottie:

NO

ernesthgarcia: LOUIS TOMLINSON - ONE DIRECTION

Sun, 14 Apr 2013 23:04:09 +0800

ernesthgarcia:

LOUIS TOMLINSON - ONE DIRECTION

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Sun, 14 Apr 2013 23:03:17 +0800

alexandramgsd: chinny chin chins ♥.♥

Sun, 14 Apr 2013 22:35:40 +0800

alexandramgsd:

chinny chin chins ♥.♥

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Sun, 14 Apr 2013 22:35:02 +0800

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Sun, 14 Apr 2013 22:31:28 +0800

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Sun, 14 Apr 2013 22:28:48 +0800